It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

Take a hike, Christmas (I'll give you the number #2 Seed!), I am talking about MARCH MADNESS people-the revelry that combines sports, a little gambling and slacking off at work.  Joy to the World!  Cue this scene for my Christmas analogy:

Experts say March Madness sucks up about 90 minutes of workers' attention for every day of the games, and lunch breaks tend to extend beyond the usual time limits.  Like Christmas in March!

I would feel really bad about this statistic (no I wouldn't), except that the "Commish" of our office pool is actually part of our Management team.  It's as if by not participating in the pool, you might botch your hopes for the next promotion.  Consider it taking one for the team!

Go TEMPLE!

-Jill

Gleaming the Cube

by Mike

Most people who have actual offices can sit at the desk, face the door and mentally qualify visitors as friend or annoyance as they arrive (or intrude) – and act accordingly. We cubed are not so fortunate.  Doorless, and with our backs turned, we are at the mercy and whim of the co-worker pop-in.

Here are the ways I have been “popped-in upon”: 

1.     The soft knock.  This barely audible, light tap on the cube edge is favored by the diffident and extremely polite. These people typically understand that you are busy. They stand not assumedly, but in serendipitous anticipation at the imaginary cube door until invited in, almost as if to say: “I can’t believe I’m standing here, but since I have your attention…”

2.     Those who start talking before they are in sight (and barely in earshot). These people know timing. They can yell “Hey, Mike!” from a distance and conclude with their demands as they arrive in your cube. I find that the best way to handle this crassness is, when you sense the person coming, pick up the phone and act like you are on an important call. Most will do an about face and leave (rather than suffer your distracted, slightly-annoyed, “I’m-on-the-phone” wave); others, however, will wait, forcing you to feign an entire phone conversation.  Which leads me to…

3.     Just stand there. Yes, there are co-workers who have come a long way to see you – some from as far away as the floor above.  They endured an exhausting elevator ride to be here and they will not be deterred. But they won’t speak up either. It is customary in this approach to enter your cube as quietly as a church mouse after a Saturday night bender and simply stand and stare at the back of your head. This is favored by the non-assertive, for they rely on that sixth-sense, that innate ability we all have to know when we are being watched, and not on making their presence known themselves. 

I am uncertain as to which of these is preferable because each one is met by me with the same expression of confused, abstracted, disappointment… WAIT!!!!  I just returned from visiting a co-worker’s cube. She was wearing ear buds and jamming silently, I am guessing, to……. nothing.  Brilliant - she avoided my pop-in, despite my trying ALL THREE of the above! Absolutely brilliant!

Pay Day Playlist #1

TGIF!  Welcome to our new installation, Pay Day Playlist.  Every two weeks we will provide a kick butt soundtrack to finish off your work week strong and get you ready to head into the weekend with a kick in your step.  All tracks courtesy of our uber talented co-worker, JULES! (can I get a Hey Ho! ps-I added a few tracks girl, couldn't resist).   Have a Pay Day Playlist you think will be music to our readers' ears, hit us up?

LBJ (cubed)

When I was graduating college in 1995 and looking for a job (and working in a produce department), I knew that somewhere in the world there was some cubic footage with my name in it. Must have been strung out on legumes.

At 8.5’ wide by 8.5’ deep by 5’ tall – my fourth, post-graduation cube is slightly larger than the average prison cell, but without plumbing (or sodomy).  I have been here for 10 years – the longest I have ever in my life been in one consistent space. I was 29 when I entered, now I’m almost 39. Getting older – starting to fart dust.

Besides work, a lot has happened among these drab, gray, slightly sulky walls.  I have been married and divorced, fallen out of my chair and had a thumbtack stuck in my hand.  I have Googled, and been very interested in, topics such as “Bulgarian cabinet making” and “Are vests in style?” and I have lost some hair, but abandoned pleated, cuffed pants – which is a trade-off I was glad to make. I have loved and lost, watched and discussed “LOST,” and was even half blind for a while (the magazines I designed then are a little crooked). While in this cube I received the Sacrament of Confirmation, stopped attending Mass, got over my fear of roller coasters, and learned to make cochinita pibil. Friendships have dwindled and kindled, I have eaten off the floor, discovered I was not a germaphobe after all, done headstands, trusted, been headstrong, foolish, persistent, buzzed, hurt, and happy.

So there is serious mileage in these 361.25 cubic feet. I don’t know what it all means, except that now I am sitting in my cube, smacking my lips on legumes, and supposed to be working. Next Google search: “inane blog posts.”

Always Wipe!

 "If you eat at your desk and you don't wash your hands, you might as well be eating at the toilet," says Bill Flynn, Everclean Services.  A University of Arizona study found a typical workspace has 400 times more germs than a toilet.

As I ponder this disgustingly disturbing statistic, I am eating at my desk. Where I always eat.  Just greattttt.  I mean, really, you try to alleviate one bad habit or try to improve upon behavior (read: I try to save money by not eating out at lunch), and bam, all your efforts go right to the sh*tter.  So rather than eat my lunch in the ladies room which would be weird (but not really any weirder than some of the antics I have seen go down there come to think of it), I just stocked up on a bunch of these:

So before you unwrap the wrap, a word to the wise.  Grab a wipe! As in that kind to the left, not the kind in the bathroom.

-Jill

Pencils, Pens, Markers…Oh My!

By: Lisa

 

I wanted to share a really neat website that provides unique office materials. Usually work will pay for your materials, but they are always basic and from the same company. So I wanted to branch out a bit and while doing a quick search one night I came across a website called See Jane Work. Yes, it does lean more toward the “ladies” crowd but it provides different materials that fit your cube, or office décor. After an hour of looking through the website, I fell in love with each design! I finally decided to treat myself to a cute little pen holder. It is part of the Vinea design and I felt it would accent my new fabric perfectly. It’s another way to make your cube part of your work life.

www.seejanework.com

...And Say Goodbye to Mine (Junk Drawer)

By: Jill

Lisa is one of those girls. Blessed with insane beauty, sharp wit and clearly as evidenced by her post below, an unparalled metabolism (the girl is THIN, Poptarts and all!).

Well, then there is me, Jill.  I like to refer to my build as extra medium!  And my will power as extra none!  So while Lisa is snacking on Poptarts, I have begun a program called The 4 Hour Body based on the book of the same name below:

Basically, you spend six days a week eating meals consisting of protein, vegetables and legumes.  No white carbs. No fruit.  BUT you do get one cheat day where the mantra "anything goes" applies.  YOU BETTER HIDE THOSE POPTARTS GIRL! My cheat day is coming.